When Good Yoga Goes Bad

Edit:  I'm submitting this post to Yeah Write this week!  It's a great weekly writing forum where you find tons of great posts.

When I was 21, I went to my very first yoga class with my mom.  When it comes to coordination, I am the Fric to her Frac.  The Tweedle-Dee to her Tweedle...uh, she can be Tweedle-Dee.

Hi Mom.

When she would go to aerobics back in the day, she would have GymSis and I in stitches as she explained how she would go left when the rest of the class would go right, how she would go forward when they would go backward, and how she was supposed to clap and step:

(I just had to add in our 90s teased bangs.) 

Then, one day I went to Zumba and knew, without a doubt, that I was not adopted. But that is a post for another time.

Anyway, I've done yoga on and off since that first class with my mom, and after this recent course of physio, I knew that starting again would be wise in order to keep me strong, limber(ish), and injury-free.

I skipped on over to my gym for an evening class. Their Biggest Loser program was meeting at the same time as yoga.  As I sat in the all-purpose exercise classroom, I was quite sure there was a bowling tournament happening outside the door.  What happened to not dropping the weights on the floor??

If you've been to yoga, you know that every instructor has her own style.  I have never been to a class, though, that just jumped right in to strengthening exercises.  No 'meditation' to start? Hello,  I need to centre myself before just jumping in.

Well, maybe not quite to that extent, but I am used to easing in to my sun salutations and I felt unprepared.

Our instructor started the calm, soothing music she was going to use for the class.

Not exactly sure how you scratch a CD.

Now that the mood was fully disrupted (wait, it was never set to begin with), it was time for the bell ringing.  This occurred at random times throughout the class. I am not sure what the goal was, but I did start to get a bit peckish.

After our warm-up, it was on to some balancing poses.  I don't know what this one was called, but here is the teacher doing it:

We were given a variation to use our straps if we couldn't reach.  I awaited further instruction.

The beginner crutch was to go stick your leg on the barre.

 I will just call this one "Posture Impossible".

One of the things I had forgotten about yoga was how tough it can be to keep your focus.  For example, sometimes you have to look up while you are bent over at the waist...hinging from the waist, if you will.  You will be looking straight ahead at the person ahead of you. And at that moment you are aware that there is someone behind you who has that same view...of you.

The horrible great! thing about the class was that there was a mirror so I could adjust my form.  So while feeling like a "princess" in Warrior Two (see what I did there? Warrior Princess...??) ,

I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and noticed a few adjustments were needed.

Why look! It's the Athletic Stance!  I did everything I could to tuck my butt, but it just seems to enjoy sticking waaaaay out.

I went back to class the following week and it was hot, crowded and just horrible.  And, there was no Sivasana (a.k.a. Corpse Pose). Are you kidding me? I can actually do that one!

So I've found a new class at the Y.   So far, so good!

Oh, and I thought I would have some fun with Picnick before it goes away; in case you missed it on Facebook and Twitter, I jumped on the meme bandwagon:

Anyone have any good yoga stories to share?


Please tell me you got the bell-ringing/hunger reference.

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